Saradamani had seen her husband but once after the marriage, when she was in her seventh year. Her only memory of the occasion was that her husband's nephew Hriday had sought her out hiding in a secret corner and worshipped her feet with lotus flowers in spite of her great fear and shyness. About six years after that, when she was thirteen years old, she was taken to her husband's house at Kamarpukur, where she stayed for a month. But Ramakrishna was then living at Dakshineswar and she could not meet him. She lived for another six weeks at Kamarpukur about six months later. But then also she did not see her husband. And then, three or four months after, the word came that Ramakrishna had come home and she had been sent for. She was now thirteen years and six or seven months old.

Ramakrishna now set himself to the fulfilment of a noble duty. He did not care

whether his wife came to him or not. But when she did come to Kamarpukur he engaged himself earnestly in her education and welfare. "His great teacher Tota Puri, knowing him to be married, had said, 'it does not matter. He alone is truly established in Brahman, whose dispassion, discrimination and wisdom are not in any way impaired even in the company of his wife. He alone has attained true knowledge of Brahman, who can look on men and women with the same eye, perceive them as identical with the Atman (the Soul) and behave with them accordingly. Those who make a distinction between men and women are far from the perfect knowledge of Brahman, though aspirants to it they may be.'"

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These words of Tota Puri now came to Ramakrishna's mind and led him to put his long-acquired spiritual knowledge to the test and devote himself to the well-being of his

Saradamani Devi

wife. Whenever he felt anything to be his duty, he could not neglect it or leave it half-finished. In the present instance also he did not act otherwise. "When he resolved to educate his young wife, he did not do it in half measures. He saw to it from the first that she attained skill in the service of God, Guru (spiritual preceptor) and guests and in the works of the household and learnt the proper use of money. He taught her above all to live in absolute self-surrender to the Lord and behave correctly with all persons under all circumstances and in all conditions and stations of life."

Her education under her husband began in her fourteenth year. She was then naturally quite an unsophisticated girl. For, "whoever had occasion to compare Calcutta girls with their sisters in Kamarpukur and other villages, must have noted that the for

mer attained maturity in body and mind quicker than the latter. The reason is probably that the latter live a natural life in the pure air of the country, moving about freely without unnecessary restriction."

The pure-hearted girl felt an indescribable joy in living in the divine company of Ramkrishna and being blessed with his self. less love and care. In later days, she often spoke of this great happiness to the women disciples of her husband. "Since then," she would say, "I always felt as if a pitcher filled with bliss had been installed in my heart. I cannot tell you how full I felt of that calm, steady and divine joy. "

A few months later Ramakrishna went back to Dakshineswar. Saradamani also returned to her father, intensely conscious of having found a supreme endless happiness. "This did not make her giddy, flippant or selfish, but calm, thoughtful and selflessly affectionate. She forgot all her personal wants. She felt an infinite sympathy for the sufferings of others, she became the very embodiment of compassion. Her great inner joy did not let her feel even the hardest of physical sufferings or the pain of seeing her love unreciprocated by her family. Thus she passed her days in her father's home, self-absorbed and content with the barest necessities."

"But though her body lived there, her mind dwelt ever with her husband at Dakshineswar. She often felt a strong desire to go and see him; but she suppressed it carefully and patiently and consoled herself with the hope that he would call her of himself to his side in due time. For, surely. he who had loved her so graciously at the first sight, could not forget her entirely."

"Thus passed her days, waiting in full faith for the arrival of that auspicious hour. But though faith and hope flowed unabated in her heart, her person underwent a daily change till in the month of Paush of 1278 she became a young woman of eighteen years. True, the great lasting joy with which her first acquaintance with her godly husband had endowed her, kept her above the joys and sorrows of her daily life; but the world did not allow its flow unimpededly. For often the villagers would refer to her husband as a mad man, as one who roved about nude, crying out the names of God, and the village women pitied and despised her as the wife of a lunatic. These, though she endured them silently, went deep into

her heart. Was he really so changed from what she had seen him? Had he really become what he was reported to be? Thus she would think, and conclude that if the reports were true, then her place should not be in her father's house but by his side to serve and nurse him. After long and careful thought, she resolved to go personally to Dakshineswar to see him with her own eyes and act as circumstances required."

Some of her distant women relatives had decided that year to go to Calcutta for bathing in the holy Ganges on the occasion of the birthday anniversary of Sri Chaitanya on the full moon day of Phalgun. She now proposed to accompany them. When they asked her father for permission, he came to understand the reason of her intended visit and arranged to take her himself to Calcutta. It was not possible to reach Calcutta by

railway from Jayrambati. One had either to walk or to travel in a palanquin, but the rich only could avail themselves of the latter means. Therefore Ramchandra Mukherji started on foot with his daughter and party.

"They passed joyfully the first two days of their journey, enlivened by the sight of endless paddy fields, interspersed with tanks full of lotus flowers, and occasional rest in the cool shades of pipal trees. But the joy did not last to the end. For, Saradamani, unused to such tough journeys on foot, fell ill of severe fever on the way and caused much anxiety to her father. He found further progress impossible and took shelter in a way-side rest house."

In the morning, however, Ramchandra found her completely free of fever and thought it best to proceed slowly, instead of waiting helplessly in the rest-house. She