Flying Solo: Single Women in MidlifeW. W. Norton & Company, 1994 - 309 pages Unmarried at 40--could there be anything worse? Our culture dictates that women who have failed to catch or hold the golden ring of marriage are destined to be deprived and depressed, perhaps even dangerous. Add the burden of age and you have a woman headed for disaster. Not necessarily so, say the authors of Flying Solo, who talked with never-married, divorced, and widowed women in midlife across the country. These women's stories offer blueprints for living, as well as inspiration, for other women "flying solo." Most of these women did not intend to be single at midlife. Yet they have given up the dream of "happily ever after" to create lives on their own that are rich and rewarding. The authors share these women's stories as well as their practical advice on managing the mechanics of being single, transforming loneliness, redefining the place of work, developing friendship and support networks, living with and without intimacy and sex with men, and choosing to have and raise children. In the process they define not just a new American lifestyle but a new American Dream. |
Contents
Acknowledgments 73 | 13 |
TAKING OFF THE DILEMMA | 29 |
Fish Got to Swim and Birds Got to Fly | 40 |
The Marriage and Motherhood Mandate | 50 |
The Mandate Goes Underground | 64 |
Giving Up the Dream | 81 |
No More Waiting for the Prince Tales of the Never Married | 89 |
Broken Dreams Women Pushed into Lives on Their Own | 103 |
A Good Ground Crew Intimacy Friendship | 171 |
Men The Icing Not the Cake | 189 |
Having Their Cake and Eating It Too Encapsulated | 201 |
Defying the Mandate Living without Motherhood | 217 |
Courageous Choices Single Mothers by Choice | 229 |
Flying Not Quite Solo | 243 |
Grit and the Art of Airplane Maintenance Managing | 257 |
One at a Table for Two The Personal Challenges of Flying | 272 |
Common terms and phrases
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